I was finishing up work for the day and I was listening to the sub on Wendy William’s radio show (Wendy was out prepping for her show in July) and I first heard it on there and on BV saw someone post a TMZ link about being rushed to the hospital.  I am thinking ok he has been rushed before and he has always pulled through.  I checked out cnn.com and it was flashing red breaking news and I clicked on to get more info and I was also praying at the same time Please oh Please lord let him be alright.  I still had him on my mind as I went downstairs to exercise (playing a few MJ songs I had at that time on my MP 3 player when I thought I had more)and UNFORTUNATELY the tv was on soccer that the one guy in my department was watching while on the elliptical.  After some time another guy had the remote while on the elliptical and he was flipping the channel.  My head was SCREAMING GOD DAMMIT PLEASE TURN TO CNN MJ IS IN SOME SERIOUS ASS SHIT (but I didn’t want to yell this statement out loud & come off as the crazy screaming black lady in the exercise room ) so I remained calm and was praying he was fine. 

Eventually the guy finished on the elliptical and went elsewhere in the exercise room and as soon as he did I grabbed that damn remote and turned that shit to CNN with a quickness to get an update.  When Wolf Blitzer first said those horrific  & conflicting words (because they were per LA Times) my heart just dropped to the floor and I said an oh no & quickly called my sister and left a voice & text message.  They still were conflicting and confusing info because they were awaiting confirmation on CNN and I was just baffled and overall didn’t have much understanding of the confusion.  I had no desire to work out as I was fixated on the tv and not paying much attention to anyone else in the room because I was in my own baffled disbelief and my brain saying no he ain’t.  Yet shortly afterwards of CNN confusion I left the exercise room and got in my car and turned on the radio to get the hard news (I pulled over to the side of the road and cried) and went on my cell phone and pulled up CNN and once I saw that confirmation also came from LA Times as well as AP I was like DAYUM (because anything you see say Associated Press for the most part is the truth).  Even though I did my other errands before going home I felt as though I wasn’t in this world because my brain was just in a disbelief state.   I was a zombie the rest of the night playing his music and watching MSNBC live coverage on the tragedy in disbelief and sadness.

And that is how I spent the rest of that fateful evening!!  The next day at work was very hard for me to do any work because I was sad but I made the best of it and actually work was good for me to do to help me get thru the day and the various radio tributes that popped up!!